tick doff tick doff

Anger is a funny thing
I am temporarily rendered discoloured
Why should the clarity of unmasked events cause this handicap ?
The focus of all sourness past , illuminates your forgivable actions
Anger is not a funny thing now

Anger is a strange thing
I am devoid of simple prudent delivery
Right differs from wrong in no tangible sense
I act as I see fit ; unfit to act ?
Anger is not very strange after all

Anger is a complex thing
Why should I want retribution for sawdust ?
Why is it subjective to interactive secrets?
Why is it actively provoking dissatisfaction ?
Why is anger so simple in the end ?

Crews control

In light of the purchase of a new Tata safari DICOR, it was unanimously agreed to that a road trip was in order, and so after ritually tanking up on a cold bonda, We left mangalore at close to 4:30 PM , hoping to reach sunset point at agumbe hopefully by ..umm.. sunset .
Now apalled as I was with Preethams extraordinary collection of Dr alban , Vengaboyz , and every degree of hindi remix between familiarly annoying to hara kiri prompting free-for-all , I decided to pack a cd with some good reggae and blues traveler. Best decision made yet.
So there we were , drowning in amazingly luxurious climate-controlled interiors ,a pack of sonte and/or bannana/potato chips within arms reach , and enough buttons to satisfy every ludicrous whim possible.
Good thing I managed some decent photos after the deviation to hebri off NH17.Then the weather decided it'd make the trip a little wet for us , if you know what I mean.
Hebri slowed us down , as Kennys superior nostrillic senses was honing in on some bread omlette. But it wasnt long before we decided to give the sunset another shot , logically deducing the 20 kms we needed to cover would be faster than the suns remaining 11 cms of descent. We were honestly surprised when we found we were wrong. Maybe it was the complete absence of light ,a charateristic feature of power outage at remote locations, or maybe it was the semi hurricane raging outside but I just couldnt figure out the location to this legendary Podi shop Rajath recommended to me. So anyway , after a pitstop for offloading some extra uric acid. We carried on to Sringeri in search of nourishment. Or something to that effect . After much discussion Aaron convinced us this little 'family' restaurant was just what we needed ,with bamboo interiors apparently. Turned out to be horizontally placed low grade tiles . Food was surprisingly good and 6 pieces of kabab for 30 rs was something we thought it best not to pass up on.Some casual dinner conversation and some wonderful kitchen photos later , we left for karkal. The drive through Kudremukh national park was probably THE highlight of the trip.At sharp 12 we conveniently found a little place open and decided to celebrate Kennys bday there with some pathetic excuse for tea and Fruitnik(bodithanda?).Some senti-menti over a brand new J100 later we ploughed on to reach Karkal - Padubidri and then thought a trip is not a trip without some sand in the car . Enter Kapu beach, and also kababs parcelled taste better under the moon with some gravel between your teeth as you try and fool some ingenius local dog family. Trust me.
One mandatory stop at Bittu da dhaba for a lassi and we tried to get some semblance of rest before it was time to pick up Aarons long lost barbeque kit from haleangadi.
Now as part of our small series of experience based insight on general goof up avoiding tips, Please do not leave any form of metal-based personal belongings in a beach house, 20 metres from the sea for longer than a day. You're lucky if its not completely ground into rust . With this new wisdom , we drove back to reach home comfortably round 7 am.
Great ! , I can make it in time for machine shop lab !

Hatetd

Make a mention of human disgrace , and let me tell you theres
nothing quite so defeating , so frustrating , so terribly demolishing ,
so mortally wounding , so suicide sanctioning ,so self esteem depriving,so simply annihilating ...

as attempting an ATD paper you suddenly realize you blank out on , 4 seconds
into the exam.....

At tension

Coming to my first actual post really , Lemme tell you why I decided to start writing a blog , maybe it was because I wanted some creative medium , maybe because I wanted to keep any latent anger/emotion in check , or maybe it sounds really cool when you tell someone to ' hey ! make sure you visit my blog' or how about the industry standard 'i-like-to-write-my-thoughts-so-the-world-can-read-it'?

bleep-you

The Human Condition

The stern KGB agent pounded on the door, “Does comrade kapolsky live here ?” “ No he doesn’t ” came the reply . Confused , the agent left only to return an hour later. “Open up Kapolsky , I know you live here !”, “ No he doesn’t “, “ then whos that inside ?” asked the agent. “Im Kapolsky” was the reply. “ Then why didn’t you answer me when I asked if you live here ?”, “ You call this living ? ? “.
Jokes aside , lets move on now. If I were to ask you, “ Are you alive ?“, Id expect raised brows and a yes that couldn’t hold enough sarcasm in it. Fair enough , can you explain how you arrived at that conclusion ?.Do you think your ‘ life’ in question, in reality meets necessary criterion ? Or should I have said your ‘existence’ ?
Existence is obligatory .Preservation of life is a basic primal instinct. Only your need to prolong existence is at stake. What purpose do your lungs serve other than your selfish need to breathe ?. Every action you have undertaken in your entire course of life was based on some selfish motive to further your own capacity to exist under changing environment. Adaptability is natures defence mechanism. Not even being human is a requisite for this exercise. A day spent in barely surviving through it is ludicrous. This fear of death does not imply love of life. A passive resistive existence is a parody of all that the human can discover. Rather , a crime.
Which brings me to our next question . “Are you aware ?”. Of what ? you ask . Of your self, your mind , your thoughts , your actions , your environment , your capacity , and your freedom to choose any of these. If you truly are aware , you’l know life is limitless to the extent of your own sanctioning, and in this frontier you have absolute freedom. Though freedom is not about weighing a choice or executing a decision. Freedom is being able to want to choose to make that particular decision.
Or leaving it at that.
The difference is simple .Your freedom to choose decides what exists and your awareness decides how you perceive that which exists. Resulting in what is commonly termed ‘Reality’. Which is basically yours to manipulate or claim victim to or alter with perspectives , and for good reason too . If your faculty of consciousness wasn’t functional to the capacity of defining a motive to elevate basic existence, id be talking to a single celled micro-organism with no brain.
So there we have it , this game of tendancy towards complexity is driven purely by active desire. A choice made to further motion. A desire to be , is a desire to live. Life is what it is because we desire it so. Desire makes us human. How can you keep living your meagre life, unless you actually wanted to ? Its just a matter of choice. Fate plays no role here. You can choose to live life on your terms , only if you so desire. Suppose I say you’re fated to either becoming a millionaire , or end up in jail , you still have a choice in it, if you so desire. You can make your own life miserable , if you sadistically so desire. Desire brings out the best , in will , in action , and character. Theres no shame in it , desiring to be moral , is desiring to be alive. Ceasing which , one is no longer human.
So if you were under the impression that desire is fleeting, immoral, temporal or even evil, first think how selfish you are in even being alive , and now realise how great a gift it truly is.

Come hence

Things to do today
#4 Go home
#17 Twiddle thumbs while on easy chair
#36 Start writing a blog
CHECK !